How do I know if I am with the right person?

Every relationship has a cycle...In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner, anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard, it was a spontaneous experience. One need not DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love say, "I was swept of my feet." Picture the expression. It implies: you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. You will notice a dramatic difference between the stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is in learning to love the person you found. People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But you couldn't fall in love with someone else TEMPORARILY, you’d feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because the key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.


SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner). Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO!!